Uncertainty
by neurolingual
Summary: tumblr prompt fill: Paige tries to avoid emily when she figures out Alison may be back


"Paige!" Emily calls out to the retreating swimmer, but it's no use. Paige ignores her, like she's done the past few days, and hops on her bike, peddling out of the school parking lot and out of Emily's sight.

"Well, that was rude," Spencer says coyly, appearing behind Emily carrying her field hockey equipment. Emily huffs, rolling her eyes and mumbling a "not now, Spence," under her breath while trudging off to her nearby car. "What, are you pulling a McCullers on me, too?" She smirks, unknowing of Emily's growing irritation.

"That's not funny, Spencer." Her tone is ice cold, Spencer frozen in place by the sheer sound of it.

"Whoa, Em, is everything all right?" She jogs over to the swimmer, leaning her side against the silver door of Emily's Corolla, watching as Emily covers her face with her hands.

"I don't know."

Spencer cocks an eyebrow. "What do you mean, 'I don't know'?"

"Exactly that!" Emily shouts, turning to face Spencer completely. "I don't know! I don't know anything anymore, Spence!" A small tear leaks from Emily's eye and she wipes it away furiously, not trying to cry in front of her friend.

"Em, talk to me," Spencer demands softly, motioning for Emily to get in to the car, where they can talk without anyone overhearing them. Emily complies, opening her door and slamming it behind her, Spencer hastily doing the same on the other side.

They're silent for a few minutes, Spencer waiting for Emily to talk first, not wanting to pry information from her obviously distressed friend, even though she desperately wanted to.

"Paige has been avoiding me all week," she answers so quietly Spencer was almost unable to hear her. "She's avoided me all week and I have no idea why."

"Did you two get in a fight?"

Emily shakes her head.

"Did you say something to make her mad?"

Another shake.

"Do you think maybe it's her parents?" Spencer asks. "A few girls in the locker room told me they overheard Paige get into a nasty argument with her father over the phone in the quad a few days ago."

Emily sighs. "Maybe, but usually when she fights with her dad, she comes to me about it. She vents to me." She sniffles. "Do you think she's going to break up with me?" The amount of fear laced in Emily's voice breaks Spencer's heart just hearing it.

"Absolutely not," Spencer denies vehemently. "McCullers has done some stupid things, but she would never do something so idiotic." She leans over the console, pulling Emily into a comforting embrace. "Why don't you go over to her house tonight? Try and talk to her alone, when no one's around."

"You mean ambush her?"

"Something like that."

So, here she stands, four hours later on the McCullers' porch, knocking softly on their large oak door. After a few seconds pass by, she hears a faint "coming" and the door opens wide, an apron-clad Mrs. McCullers greeting her at the doorway.

"Oh, Emily," she sounds surprised, but not angry, at her daughter's girlfriend's sudden appearance. "Paige didn't say you were coming over."

"We weren't planning on me coming over to visit," she answers honestly. "I just… I needed to talk to her about something, but she… she's been avoiding me."

Mrs. McCullers sighs, ending with a disbelieving chuckle. "Yep, that sounds like Paige." She steps aside, opening the door wider. "Well, come in, Emily. Paige is out back by the pool. You can cut through the kitchen."

With a small smile and a thank you, Emily makes her way inside, giving a wave to Mr. McCullers, who was currently reading the newspaper, and stalks out to the McCullers' back porch where, sure enough, she spots her girlfriend a few meters away, looking down into the glowing blue water.

Emily approaches cautiously, unable to gauge how Paige will react to her sudden appearance. She stops a few feet away, legs frozen in place by the soft whimpers she hears escaping her girlfriend's lips. Trying to be sneaky, she takes another step forward, only to step on a twig, the snap alerting the oblivious swimmer, whose head whips around so quickly, Emily thinks it could snap right off, too.

"What are you doing here?" Paige asks angrily, trying her best to maintain a scowl.

"Why are you avoiding me?"

"That doesn't answer my question."

"Well, that doesn't answer mine, either." Emily sighs. "Paige, what is going on?"

"Nothing," she mumbles.

Emily takes a few tentative steps forward until she's directly behind her girlfriend. "It sure doesn't look like 'nothing'."

"Everything's fine, Em, just please, go away," Paige says through gritted teeth, now turned facing Emily.

"I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong." She reaches out to cup Paige's cheek, but the other girl steps away, Emily's heart clenching painfully. "Paige, please, I want to help."

"Stop, Em!" Paige shouts. "I don't want your help! I don't need you help! You never helped me before, so why start now! Just… just go help Alison!"

_What?_

"Paige, what the hell are you talking about?"

At this point, Paige is no longer trying to disguise the hurt on her face. Tears stain her cheeks and her lips tremble; Emily thinks she's never seen Paige so distraught in her life.

"Just, please go, Em," she begs. "I don't want you to see me like this."

Emily reaches forward and traps Paige in a crushing embrace, ignoring the other girl's squirms of protest as she tries to break free. She only holds her close, not wanting to let Paige go.

"Paige," she whispers, "I love you. I want to see all of you, even the bad parts."

"Emily…" she sighs into a tan neck, no longer making a feeble attempt at escaping. "I love you so much, but I'm so _scared_."

"Of what? Alison?" She feels Paige nod against her skin. "Why would you be afraid of Alison?"

Paige scoffs, craning her neck up to look at Emily with harsh eyes. "I'm not afraid _of_ Alison, I'm just… afraid of what it'll mean for us."

Emily tucks a few strands of hair behind Paige's ear, wiping away remnants of tears from her cheek. "We don't even know if Alison is truly back yet."

"I know but… still. Em, I can't lose you." Paige's voice is so raw with emotion that Emily begins tearing up herself.

"You won't," Emily protests quietly. "You won't lose me, Paige. Just because… just because Ali _may_ or _may not_ be back, and I don't even know if she was the one who pulled us from the fire, I may have been hallucinating from, you know, lack of oxygen," this makes Paige laugh, "that doesn't mean she'll come between us. I won't _let_ her come between us." She's quiet for a few moments, allowing Paige to digest everything. "Is this why you've been avoiding me?"

Paige dips her head sheepishly, mumbling a soft "maybe", making Emily grin.

"What have I told you about looking away from me?"

She looks back up, an apology written across her features before she even opens her mouth. "I'm sorry I freaked out, but it's just…"

"Ali has a way of ruining everyone's lives."

"Exactly."

"Well," Emily snakes her arms around Paige's waist, resting their foreheads together, "I'm not letting her ruin mine anymore. Or yours, either. She has no control over me – over us – anymore. That, I know I can guarantee." She ends the promise with a soft kiss to Paige's forehead, and when she pulls away, Paige captures her lips in a smoldering kiss, leaving her breathless when they finally separate.

She sees a flash of playfulness in Paige's eyes, feeling her girlfriends hands creep to the hem of her jeans; Emily gasps sharply, stepping away, only to be reeled back in by her belt loops.

"I've missed you," Paige declares huskily. "Let's go for a swim."

"Paige, your parents…" she trails off once Paige peppers kisses along her jaw line.

"Don't worry, Em," she whispers into thick, dark hair. "I can be quiet."


End file.
